In a discovery archaeologists are calling surprisingly inconvenient for quarantine enthusiasts, researchers say a plague hopped from Europe to Asia 4,000 years ago.

The study suggests it rode along the Silk Road with traders who treated hygiene like a suggestion and a handshake with a flea.

Rather than a single heroic sneeze, the pathogen crept through crowded markets on the Bronze Age global supply chain, aka a really busy flea market.

According to the paper, the mystery of how it spread boils down to a perfect storm of commerce, caravans, and questionable latrines.

Ancient DNA pulled from pottery shards suggests the plague rode in on the same caravan as spices and rumors, which apparently travel fast in clay.

The team sequenced ancient DNA from pottery shards, archaeology’s version of snooping through a neighbor’s mail.

They trace the route through ports, palaces, and the occasional yak crossing, a travel itinerary that would make today’s congestion look efficient.

The image of Bronze Age marketplaces includes smoky stalls, loud bargaining, and the unspoken rule that hygiene was a suggestion, not a policy.

Some historians say the finding explains why ancient cities smelled like garlic and ambition.

Public health officials joked that this proves travel has always been the true accelerant of diseases, and also the reason we invented quarantines in the first place.

The study’s authors have named the episode the Silk Road Spread, a moniker that sounds more like a fashion trend from a mummy’s travel blog.

A press release promises an atlas tracing every layover, visa stamp, and spice jar associated with the outbreak.

Cultural scholars quipped that ancient travelers basically invented ‘flexible booking’ years before airline companies.

Meanwhile, archaeologists are updating museum dioramas to include a ‘plague lane’ along the Silk Road, right between the camel ride and the cumin stand.

If you think your trip is rough, imagine a Bronze Age pilgrim carrying a pestilence across continents with fewer photos, more fleas, and equal parts bragging and regret.