In a spectacle that could double as a corporate town hall, officials unveiled a plan to clear Gaza City so thoroughly that even the dust will file a 1040 form.

The initiative, described in a press release as Nothing Will Be Left, promises to sweep through city blocks with military precision and a promotional budget bigger than the last fiscal quarter.

Spokespeople insisted the phrase refers to assets, not people, a claim reinforced by banners reading We Sweep, We Budget, We Like Spreadsheets.

A logo featured a broom wearing sunglasses and a hard hat, because nothing screams progress like a cleaning implement in protective gear.

Analysts on television compared the plan to a quarterly earnings report, except bonuses come in the form of emergency road upgrades and temporary curfews.

The campaign’s creed zero left behind was explained by a PR consultant as a commitment to not leaving any asset unaccounted for, especially valuable real estate that often doubles as a skyline.

A 350-page PowerPoint deck reportedly dazzles even the most jaded briefing-room butterfly, complete with charts, color gradients, and a slide on the importance of dramatic pause timing.

Bidders lined up offering precision logistics and a fleet of bulldozers that also double as coffee makers, though the barista mode is reportedly still in beta.

Residents voiced cautious optimism—mostly because the plan includes a robust section on exit routes and an optional soundtrack to lull nerves during drill announcements.

Drones with infrared cameras and motivational posters will patrol streets, while a rotating speaker system promises uplifting updates about progress every 15 minutes.

Think tanks released studies on the economy of left-behinds, explaining how a clean sweep could boost real estate values and spark a debate about what counts as left in urban geography.

Local businesses prepared slogans for the campaign, such as Clear today rent free tomorrow, before realizing the paperwork to terminate an alleyway would require a small law firm.

As the plan unfolds, press conferences resemble product launches, with journalists taking notes on the color of urgency and the exact shade of budget optimism.

Whether the sweep will leave a pristine, market-ready city or a messy, well-documented ledger of collateral remains unclear, but the spreadsheet will keep compiling far more data than anyone expected.