World
Netanyahu Outraged Nations Recognize Thing That Already Exists, Demands Geography Apologize
Drone Books Beachfront Chaos; Tourism Board Rates It ‘Two Stars, Too Explosive’
China Pledges to Cut Emissions; Planet Immediately Checks Fine Print
Trump Declares Europe Hellbound, UN Requests Return Receipt
Ukrainian Drones Crash Russia’s Beach Day, Kremlin Denies Owning Flip-Flops
Kamchatka Hit By Overachieving Quake; Local Tea Unspilled, World Disappointed
UN Braces as Trump Returns With Carry-On and Caps-Lock Diplomacy
U.S. Rejects China’s Ocean Park, Cites Endangered Species: International Law
Gen Z Declares Revolution; Corruption Asked To Uninstall Itself
Trump: EU Must Tariff China, India 100% To Spook Putin
Macron Appoints Lecornu Prime Minister, Republic Updates Its GPS
Rome Grants Fast-Track Visas to Grace: LGBTQ Pilgrims Upgrade to Aisle Seats
Xi Condemns Bullying, Shoves World Into Locker To Make His Point
Man Mistakes Russian Consulate for Drive-Thru; Orders Sanctions To-Go
Punjab’s Breadbasket Announces It Is Now A Soup Bowl
Regional Parliament Tests Fire Policy By Becoming Bonfire, Government Issues Smoke-Shaped Statements
Netanyahu, McCain Trade Verbs; Gaza Still Out of Nouns Like 'Food'
France’s Survival At Stake, Bayrou Warns; Baguette Tapped To Lead Coalition
Milei Retreats From Rally After Rocks Launch Opposition Campaign
France Sneezes, Europe Catches Cold, Wall Street Sells Tissues at a Markup